Why do we take advice from an unrepentant cheater? I know I am not the only one who did. At least, I did this for a time. I opened myself up to her criticism as if she was qualified to identify “the problems.” This likely comes from a desperation to “save the marriage.” A solution … Continue reading “Do not take marriage advice from unrepentant cheaters!”
Category: Trauma of adultery
Reading cheater tea leaves
When I was going through the darkest part of my marriage dying, I really did not want the divorce. (As a side note, I am so grateful today that I was freed by that divorce. God has used Mrs. DM and Munchkin to restore the laughter in the halls of my heart.) A temptation I … Continue reading “Reading cheater tea leaves”
Dating mate nonsense!
Excuses might be found for a thief who steals because he is starving. But if he is caught, he must pay back seven times what he stole, even if he has to sell everything in his house. -Proverbs 6:30-31, NLT Dating your spouse. I know that I am about to sacrifice a holy cow of … Continue reading “Dating mate nonsense!”
Empty Religious Language Manipulations
“I only say this because I love you.” -Christian busybody “For your own good, I hope you have forgiven them.” -Concerned Christian I cannot stand people who use the name of Christ to manipulate other Christians. This is the result of my experiences around the dissolution of my first marriage. I sadly encountered many “Christians” … Continue reading “Empty Religious Language Manipulations”
Discerning godly sorrow
Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death. – 2 Cor. 7:10, NIV When you see the fruit of advice destroying someone or yourself, you are seeing something bringing death as this verse tells us. This is not from God. God is not one who came … Continue reading “Discerning godly sorrow”
Magnanimous Cheaters (or so they think)
“I have to leave you. It is for the good of our marriage,” says the magnanimous cheater. Some cheaters love to paint themselves as the generous one. They claim their motives are pure or even for the faithful spouse’s own good. I even suspect some cheaters even believe these things! The problem with such “magnanimous” cheaters … Continue reading “Magnanimous Cheaters (or so they think)”
Adultery, abortion, and divorce
I wonder. I wonder how many faithful fathers never got to meet their children. The cheater decided she rather abort than carry the child to term. I wonder. No statistics exist on this matter. So, I wonder. I am sure it happens. Cheaters are famous for dodging responsibility. A child is a huge responsibility. This … Continue reading “Adultery, abortion, and divorce”
Cheaters as real bullies
The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. -Proverbs 12:18, NIV We hear stories in the news of bullies pushing people to kill themselves. It is truly awful. (By the way, please call 911 or reach out for emergency medical assistance if you are seriously considering suicide. The … Continue reading “Cheaters as real bullies”
DM, How did you move forward into a new relationship with Mrs. DM?
Hi DM, Question for you. How were you able to move forward with Mrs. DM with regards to trust? I am most likely getting divorced and am afraid that I would carry the scars of my WH’s serial infidelity/dishonesty into the next relationship (if I were to be brave enough to try to love again). … Continue reading “DM, How did you move forward into a new relationship with Mrs. DM?”
Being an adultery victim AND …
For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. -2 Timothy 1:7, KJV While adultery victims are not less than victims of their cheaters, they are also more. They are FAITHFUL SPOUSES! SURVIVORS. Just because we have been cheated upon does not mean … Continue reading “Being an adultery victim AND …”