“You never really know what happens in a marriage.”

“You never really know what happens in a marriage,” says “friend.” If this is how your “friend” responds to your disclosure of infidelity abuse, you need to find a new, true friend. This person does not want to face a difficult truth and is telling you their unwilling to be supportive of you. Again, there … Continue reading ““You never really know what happens in a marriage.””

A lifestyle of lying

19 And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. 20 For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved.  -John 3:19-20, KJV I have a theory about why some cheaters refuse to … Continue reading “A lifestyle of lying”

Then the pieces fit.

Relief. The months of stone-cold or downright cruel responses. Warmth disappearing overnight like a Minnesotan May blizzard. It all started to make sense. I wasn’t imagining things. The Other Man. He existed. Had existed for months! This is one of the strangest and most surreal parts of discovering infidelity. The moment of confirmation is not only … Continue reading “Then the pieces fit.”

Cheating Emotionally

27 “You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’ 28 But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. -Matthew 5:27-28, NLT Cheating emotionally does not give the unfaithful spouse permission to bash their partner with their pastor. Emotional cheating is sin. … Continue reading “Cheating Emotionally”

Comforting words for faithful spouses

Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. -Hebrews 13:4, NIV “Yes, it happened. She cheated on you. And that’s right: you didn’t deserve it. It’s not your fault. Not at all.” You really want to help a faithful spouse? … Continue reading “Comforting words for faithful spouses”

Forgiveness: Do I trust God?

From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears. The earth trembled and quaked, and the foundations of the mountains shook; they trembled because he was angry. -Psalm 18:6b-7, NIV Can I trust God with my hurt? I think the answer to this question is answering the question of whether or … Continue reading “Forgiveness: Do I trust God?”

Cheater-Speak: “I had unmet emotional needs.”

“You were all so busy with the kids. I felt neglected.” -Cheater “I never would have cheated if you had given me the attention he did!” -Cheater Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV Your cheater may try to “justify” their sin to you. Maybe they will point to you spending too much time … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I had unmet emotional needs.””