I can distinctly remember driving down a major highway back home wishing the pain to end. Part of me knew there was no going back to how things “were.” I still missed the fantasy, though. The ending of my marriage came with tremendous losses; this I knew in the deepest of places. I just wanted … Continue reading “Temptation of the fantasy “reconciliation””
Category: Emotional Affair
Self Doubt’s Lasting Legacy
But solid food belongs to those who are of full age, that is, those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil. -Hebrews 5:14, NKJV I still struggle honoring my own experience as valid. Cheaters are “good” at devaluing the faithful spouse’s experience. They do not want them to believe the … Continue reading “Self Doubt’s Lasting Legacy”
PSA: Never divorce stance is hazardous!
Public Service Announcement: When divorce is NEVER acceptable, then every sort of evil behavior in the marriage IS acceptable! This is what taking a hard stance against all divorce entails. Requiring faithful spouses to remain married after adulterous activity is enabling abusive, sinful behavior. It is toleration of adultery. God gives us permission to divorce … Continue reading “PSA: Never divorce stance is hazardous!”
Cheater-Speak: God forgives me.
Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. -Matthew 5:23-24, NKJV “God forgives me,” says “Christian” Cheater. “Really?! What work have … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: God forgives me.”
God is not surprised or overwhelmed
For hasn’t he promised you, “I will never leave you alone, never! And I will not loosen my grip on your life!” -Hebrews 13:5b, TPT A temptation when facing difficult circumstances is to believe we are on our own. It may feel that way, for sure. I know I felt it. The abandonment feelings are … Continue reading “God is not surprised or overwhelmed”
Reading cheater tea leaves
When I was going through the darkest part of my marriage dying, I really did not want the divorce. (As a side note, I am so grateful today that I was freed by that divorce. God has used Mrs. DM and Munchkin to restore the laughter in the halls of my heart.) A temptation I … Continue reading “Reading cheater tea leaves”
Dating mate nonsense!
Excuses might be found for a thief who steals because he is starving. But if he is caught, he must pay back seven times what he stole, even if he has to sell everything in his house. -Proverbs 6:30-31, NLT Dating your spouse. I know that I am about to sacrifice a holy cow of … Continue reading “Dating mate nonsense!”
Empty Religious Language Manipulations
“I only say this because I love you.” -Christian busybody “For your own good, I hope you have forgiven them.” -Concerned Christian I cannot stand people who use the name of Christ to manipulate other Christians. This is the result of my experiences around the dissolution of my first marriage. I sadly encountered many “Christians” … Continue reading “Empty Religious Language Manipulations”
Discerning godly sorrow
Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death. – 2 Cor. 7:10, NIV When you see the fruit of advice destroying someone or yourself, you are seeing something bringing death as this verse tells us. This is not from God. God is not one who came … Continue reading “Discerning godly sorrow”
Magnanimous Cheaters (or so they think)
“I have to leave you. It is for the good of our marriage,” says the magnanimous cheater. Some cheaters love to paint themselves as the generous one. They claim their motives are pure or even for the faithful spouse’s own good. I even suspect some cheaters even believe these things! The problem with such “magnanimous” cheaters … Continue reading “Magnanimous Cheaters (or so they think)”