Should a man take his body, which is part of Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never! – I Corinthians 6:15b, NLT When someone is a cheater, they are also an abuser. You cannot have one without the other. Soul rape is abusive. I am astounded by how cheating and adultery are too often treated … Continue reading “PSA: Cheating IS abuse!!!”
Category: Emotional Affair
PSA: Divorce “jokes” by pastors are NOT funny!
Pastors, Please stop making divorce “jokes.” When faithful spouses hear pastors talking about how grateful they are that their wives haven’t left them, the pastor could not be more insensitive and tone deaf to those who have experienced abandonment. Such “joking” is teaching: -You are teaching your people divorce happens over everyday irritations in marriage. … Continue reading “PSA: Divorce “jokes” by pastors are NOT funny!”
When a cheater declines offer to rebuild marriage…
“Even if she cheated on me, I would still stay with her and try to make the marriage work,” says faithful spouse. “You’d just hold that over her head forever,” replies cheater apologist. When this is the mentality or response from the cheater side, you know the marriage is done. This sort of response exposes … Continue reading “When a cheater declines offer to rebuild marriage…”
Cheater refusal to repent not OKAY!
Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. -Matthew 5:23-24, NKJV These two verse uttered by Jesus are why I doubt … Continue reading “Cheater refusal to repent not OKAY!”
Crossing over into emotional affair territory
Ever experienced a cheater deeply worried about another’s feelings? They are just trying to be a good “hostess.” What is important is that this “friend” feels comfortable. They want their approval. What is NOT important to this person is how their spouse feels or thinks! This is a tell-tale sign that your spouse is cheating. … Continue reading “Crossing over into emotional affair territory”
Mailbag: How long will it take for me to recover?
Dear DM, Thank you for your blog and the articles in there. I recently stumbled across your blog because 2 weeks ago I discovered my husband having an affair (he has been having an affair for 4 months and only confessed because he got found out. If I had not found out it would have gone … Continue reading “Mailbag: How long will it take for me to recover?”
Liars with God?
Who may stand in his holy place? Only those whose hands and hearts are pure, who do not worship idols and never tell lies. -Psalm 24:3b-4, NLT What struck me this morning as I read this verse out of the New Living Translation was how seriously God takes lying. Lying is named right next to … Continue reading “Liars with God?”
Triggering phrase: “Open and honest”
“We need to have open and honest communication,” says Cheater. When I hear the phrase “open and honest,” I am slightly triggered. It sends me back to the conflict with my ex-wife as our marriage ended. The words aren’t bad in and of themselves. Such a goal for communication is admirable. We want to be … Continue reading “Triggering phrase: “Open and honest””
Cheaters not behaving as if married
But the way of the wicked is like deep darkness; they do not know what makes them stumble. -Proverbs 4:19, NIV A common theme of stories with cheaters is how they exploit faithful spouse trust. One of those ways is to take advantage of the faithful spouse’s trust that they would not behave in ways … Continue reading “Cheaters not behaving as if married”
Cheater-Speak: “We were married too young.”
“We just married too young. That’s why it didn’t work out.” -Cheater I just do not buy the “married too young” explanation for divorce. It is an excuse. This is a tidy lie to cover up for the cheater’s character deficits and to help people avoid feeling uncomfortable in facing the hard truth: The cheater … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “We were married too young.””