Worthy of Basic Respect and Love!

See how great a love the Father has bestowed on us, that we would be called children of God; and such we are. -I John 3:1a, NASB With pastors and other Christian leaders, it can sometimes feel like the faithful spouse is on trial regarding the infidelity or divorce. Behind the questions regarding how my … Continue reading “Worthy of Basic Respect and Love!”

At What Point Is the Affair Considered “Physical” Biblically?

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” -Matthew 5:27-28, NIV “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” -Matthew … Continue reading “At What Point Is the Affair Considered “Physical” Biblically?”

Never Would Have Thought…

Instead of your shame you will have a double portion, And instead of humiliation they will shout for joy over their portion. Therefore they will possess a double portion in their land, Everlasting joy will be theirs. -Isaiah 61:7, NASB When I was going through my divorce, I never would have thought God could transform … Continue reading “Never Would Have Thought…”

But God was faithful to us while we were faithless!

“Return, O faithless sons, I will heal your faithlessness.” “Behold, we come to You; For You are the Lord our God. -Jeremiah 3:22, NASB “You should take him back. After all, God takes us back when we have sinned and been unfaithful to Him.” – Christian “friend” Even God required repentance as a condition for … Continue reading “But God was faithful to us while we were faithless!”

Not there to solve the marriage problems!

Attending marriage counseling with a cheater on the way out of the marriage is a very confusing experience. At least in my experience–I know there are some exceptions to this–marriage counselors and pastors are often not equipped to identify tell-tale cheating and exiting behavior then use that information to help protect the faithful partner. The … Continue reading “Not there to solve the marriage problems!”

Pastoral Resource: Addressing Adulterous Situations

Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may … Continue reading “Pastoral Resource: Addressing Adulterous Situations”

Christian Divorce Support and Feeding “Miracle” Thinking

DivorceCare did me a great deal of good. I know I will forever be thankful for the people I met in the DivorceCare group while I was working in St. Cloud, MN. God definitely directed me to that community and group. As you can tell by visiting my RESOURCES page, I encourage people to find … Continue reading “Christian Divorce Support and Feeding “Miracle” Thinking”

It is a choice–bad one, yes–but still a choice.

  I also will laugh at your calamity; I will mock when your fear cometh; When your fear cometh as desolation, and your destruction cometh as a whirlwind; when distress and anguish cometh upon you. Then shall they call upon me, but I will not answer; they shall seek me early, but they shall not find me: For … Continue reading “It is a choice–bad one, yes–but still a choice.”

Answering Well-Meaning Busybody Christians

“Sure, he cheated. But what was your part in all of that?” – Well-Meaning, Busybody Christian If you are a faithful spouse having gone through or going through a divorce, you likely have encountered this person: The Well-Meaning, Busybody Christian. Oblivious to how hurtful their comments and questions are, these individuals actually believe they are doing faithful spouses … Continue reading “Answering Well-Meaning Busybody Christians”

PSA: Christians, Stop Blaming Adultery Victims For Divorces!

 And I saw that for all the adulteries of faithless Israel, I had sent her away and given her a writ of divorce, yet her treacherous sister Judah did not fear; but she went and was a harlot also. -Jeremiah 3:8, NASB Is God to be blamed for His divorce of Israel here in Jeremiah … Continue reading “PSA: Christians, Stop Blaming Adultery Victims For Divorces!”