Author: Divorce Minister

Do not wish the pain of adultery discovery on anyone!

While some pastors will talk about not wishing divorce on anyone, I think that is a late wish. The problem is the adultery and its accompanying lies. Sometimes a situation is only remedied through a hard and painful action. Surgery requires cutting into flesh. It is bloody, painful, and costly. Of course, I would wish … Continue reading “Do not wish the pain of adultery discovery on anyone!”

Cheaters return to own “vomit”

As a dog returns to its vomit, so fools repeat their folly. -Proverbs 26:11, NIV Committing adultery is foolish, foolish behavior.  The Bible names it as such in Proverbs 5. And the general observation from chapter twenty-six is that fools repeat such folly. Maybe this does not happen always, but it usually does as this … Continue reading “Cheaters return to own “vomit””

Divorce is NOT “of the Devil!”

“Divorce is of the Devil!” -Christian leader I want to begin this post by owning that this was probably how I would have talked about divorce prior to my own experience with it. My Christian background was very anti-divorce. This made my situation with my first (now ex) wife even more painful than it had to … Continue reading “Divorce is NOT “of the Devil!””

Cheater-Speak: “A cry for help” affair

“Don’t you see it [the cheating] was a cry for help?! If only you had ____ (fill in favorite cheater grievance with faithful spouse) more, then I wouldn’t have cheated.” -Unfaithful spouse Using the “Cry for help” excuse for an affair–either emotional or physical–is manipulation pure and simple.  The cheater is using this label to … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “A cry for help” affair”

Nothing like THOSE “you are doing the Christian thing wrong” lectures…

Got to love those “you are doing the ‘Christian’ thing wrong” lectures from the naive Christian leaders or cheater apologists! Right?! These lectures are really simply another way people blame faithful spouses for their marriages imploding and–sometimes–even for the cheating. It is disgusting. They might take the form of blaming you for not “forgiving” well. … Continue reading “Nothing like THOSE “you are doing the Christian thing wrong” lectures…”

Religious cheaters want both!

You cry out, “Why doesn’t the Lord accept my worship?” I’ll tell you why! Because the Lord witnessed the vows you and your wife made when you were young. But you have been unfaithful to her, though she remained your faithful partner, the wife of your marriage vows. -Malachi 2:14, NLT Religious cheaters are not satisfied with simply cheating. … Continue reading “Religious cheaters want both!”

Caution: Consuming Criticism

Is every criticism worth consuming? Do we always learn something about ourselves from a criticism? Short answer: No. If someone knows you tend to always “consume” or take to heart a criticism, this gives that individual incredible power over you. They are able to control you via their criticism. This is unhealthy and ungodly. Fearing … Continue reading “Caution: Consuming Criticism”

Cheater-Speak: “I wasn’t trying. It just happened.”

“I wasn’t trying to cheat on you. It just sort of ‘happened.’” -Cheater A cheater speaking like this is an unrepentant cheater. How do I know? Well, repentance starts with the honesty of owning one’s own choices and behavior. The cheater speaking like this is not being honest on those fronts. Adultery is just something that … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I wasn’t trying. It just happened.””